A lesson and a gift from a spirit
When I was about 9 years old we went to spend a month in the village my dad grew up in. At the end of October we went with Abuelita Juana and Tia Paulina to prepare the grave of Abuelito Roque, who had died long before I was born. It was a humid and warm evening and I remember the graveyard was so vibrant and full of energy. I had never seen a graveyard like that, so full of flowers and garlands and life itself. I remember we were joyful whilst we watched and helped my Tia and Abuelita hang the flowers. I felt a great sense of honour for the grandfather I had never met and I was so proud of how beautiful his gravestone looked. I don't remember specifically what happened but I was looking around at the graves next to his, and the one next to his belonged to someone who wasn't from our family, their gravestone was maybe not as well cared for, perhaps the stone had cracks with weeds mindlessly growing out of them. The graveyard is not organised in the same way I had seen in england, the graves were all very close to one another, seemingly even placed on top of each other. I had a very naïve, careless thought that perhaps I even spoke aloud, that this persons grave shouldn't have been as close as it was to my grandfather's. Later when we returned to the car, I think I had got inside the car whilst my family were hanging around, and then had decided to get back out again. As I did, I stepped directly into a swirly black mass, an enormous ants nest with thousands of ants climbing over each other, my foot sinking into them as they began crawling over my blue sandal and up my leg, rightfully biting me for disturbing their peace. My dad quickly came to help brush them off as I winced in pain. I remember thinking and perhaps even said it aloud again, I knew that this happened precisely because I was not respectful or kind to the spirit of the grave next to Abuelito Roque. That spirit, just like me, had every right to be there. I often think of this incident and in my mind return to the next door grave and spirit I never saw, but felt, to pay my respects and acknowledge that my carelessness and pride was unkind and disrespectful. I think we have a lot to learn from the spirits we do not see but feel.